Bit, Bridle, & Behavior Modification

"Do not be like the horse or the mule, which have no understanding but must be controlled by the bit and the bridle or they will not come to you."

~Psalm 32:7

Reading in the psalms the other day, this verse struck me like it hasn't before. We are commanded not to be like the horse and mule, led by external means but lacking understanding, but how often is that exactly what the people of God encourage?

We start with the behavior, asking others to pursue a life of godliness before knowing Him intimately. Asking for obedience, not from those who have put their faith in Christ (even if they struggle with that commitment at times) but from those who do not yet know His life or the freedom His commands bring.

Maybe because we want our kids to know God and right behavior seems like it'll put them on the path towards that.

Maybe because we want people to act how we think is right.

Maybe because we want people to know God, and behavior is easier to track, and thus it can feel like success in a way heart change doesn't.

Maybe because the change brought on from developing a relationship can move slowly, and we don't know how to reconcile people believing in God and yet still having ways that are of the world. This can create an anxiety in us for them and the reality of their faith, and right action, tackling the behavior instead of diving deeper into their understanding of God, can feel like a balm to our fears.

Or maybe this is less rampant than I think, and I'm being more influenced by growing up in the Bible Belt where everyone is "Christian." Or from growing up in a Christian school where being godly was part of the expectation, and it was much easier to teach godly behavior than it was how to enter into relationship with God. 

Sometimes behavior modification is at the forefront because people are looking for results more than souls; other times behavior modification is at the forefront out of a genuine desire to give people tools to know and to live for Jesus, but behavior modification will never save. 

If we give people the outward expression of godliness--even with the most earnest heart--but fail to disciple them in the heart of God, we give them nothing.

We give them clanging cymbals because love is not in it. Because the mark of a changed life isn't action of devotion but a heart that longs for it. A heart that knows God, a heart that is moved by God, a heart that is submitted to God. Godliness comes from understanding, and without that all we have is meaningless moral action. Action that, yes, can have value in the world but which will never save the soul.

I've seen this too much growing up. Kids who grew up in Christian homes and learned what godliness looked like and then dedicated their lives to those external representations. Kids who wanted to be "good," who did not scorn the religion of their parents, who wanted to be a Christian, but who never knew God. Who thought actions got them to a relationship with God instead of a relationship with God being what got into their actions.

As humans, it's easy for us to focus on the outward--after all, it's all we can see. And this can be biblical. We are told that we will know someone by the fruit they bear. And yet in the journey of sanctification, that fruit often requires more patience to change than we have. If a heart knows God, trusts God, submits to God, and is knowing God more and more day by day, that heart will change. We need not fear when it doesn't look like how we think it should when we think it should; salvation is not in our hands. Action is good, and we are called to godliness, but if we emphasize the action and fail to guide the heart, we create a people who maybe have an earnest desire to follow God and yet who have no understanding. Who do not know God. Who are led by the bit and bridle of behavior instead of a heart of alignment with their LORD, which changes everything else.

We have to pursue understanding. To know God is to see hearts change.